Some commonly used words & phrases.. (and their meanings!)

Is that you? If you're asked this, please don't answer with "Of course it's me, you idiot!". They only want to know if you've finished  whatever you're doing.
Are you away? Again, no stupid sarcastic answers. They're asking if you are going out / leaving.
What about ye? What's up, How are you?
Tee, Te & Till. Different ways of saying 'To', depending on which area of N.I. you come from.
Catch yourself on! Wise up.
Dead on! Great. Perfect, Really nice. (Often used to describe people.)
Wet the tea. Make some tea.
Away in the head. Lost his senses. Stupid.
Away on! You're kidding!
Sound. Also a word of praise generally used for describing people.- 'He's dead sound!'
Wait till I tell ye. This is difficult to translate. It's a way of starting a conversation or introducing something important or interesting into the conversation.
I tell a lie. It's what you say when you've  realised that you said something wrong!
Do you think I came up the Lagan in a bubble? Do you think I was born yesterday? (The Lagan is the river that runs through Belfast. This phrase varies depending on which river you were brought up by.)
Class, Cracker, Grand, Stickin' out, Magic, Smashing, Brilliant. Just a few more ways to say something's great.
Ta, Ta-ta, Cheers, Thankin' you. And a few ways to say thanks.
Are you gettin'? Have you been helped / served?
He/she/that/this 'Does my head in.' Drives you up the wall.
Mucker. Mate, friend.
Steady/Steady on. Similar to saying 'Behave' or 'Watch it!'.
I'll do you! I'll kill you.
Clattered, Lamped. Hit, Punched.
Faffin'/ Faffin' about. Messing around.
Peelers. Cops.
Spide. A term used when talking about trendy people who listen to rave and dance music.
Wick, Naff. Stupid or useless.
Eejit. Local pronunciation of the word idiot.
Bog. Bathroom.
Boggin', Mingin', Mankin'. Messy and horrible.
Minger. Ugly person.
Talent. Attractive people.
Snog. Kiss.
One night stand. In N.I. it can mean anything from a kiss, to going all the way.
Yous. Plural of you.
Ach! Oh, or Ah. As in 'Ach, What about ye?'
Aye. Yes.
Bake, Gub. Mouth.
Pull. To get, or try to get 'lucky'. I.e.. 'Did he pull?' - 'He's on the pull tonight.'
Crack/Craic. Fun.
The Black Stuff. Guinness.
Dummy. Pacifier.
Pram. Stroller.
Nappy. Diaper.
Biscuit. Cookie.
Poke. Ice cream cone.
Lolly/Ice lolly. Popsicle.
Scone. A sweet biscuit...of sorts.
Bun/ Wee bun. Sweet roll, danish.
Round. One portion, i.e.. 'round of toast'.
Gravy ring. Ring doughnut.
Bap. A bun or roll. Used mainly for sandwiches.
Ulster Fry. A fried meal with eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes, soda bread, potato bread, beans, tomatoes, mushrooms, etc. ALL FRIED.
Soda. Soda bread. If you want the drink, you'll get the bread!
Sausengers. Sausages.
Lozengers. Lozenges.
Sweets. Candy.
Your man/woman. That man/woman.
Thingy. In America, they would say 'What's-her/his/name?'
Cheerio. Good-bye.
All the best! Good-bye, wishing you all the best.

A word of warning.
People in Northern Ireland will most likely respect you a lot more if you don't try to talk like the locals (unless you've lived here and it becomes natural.) They'll know immediately that you are from another country, which automatically means that you don't speak 'proper (Northern Ireland) English'! I've created this list mainly because I think it is sometimes  better to understand than to assimilate!

Situations in Conversations...(to help the confusion!)

People in Northern Ireland often take words that generally are at the start of a sentence and add it on to the end. I.e.. You've already had some chocolate, but! 'But',  'Just', and 'Like' are the most common of these words. And sometimes phrases can be added on to the end to emphasize the point, such as.. I think it's stupid, so I do. or It's stupid, so it is. And of course, 'So it is.' can be used on it's own.
Person #1 "It's raining."
Person #2 "Ach, so it is."
The word Wee is also used a LOT. Commonly known to mean 'very small', it can be used to emphasize a point as well.
Wee small hours of the morning. or Would you like a wee cup of tea?

As I write all of these things, I feel a bit bad, as they seem very cliché and stereo-typical, and the examples aren't the best. But, they are just examples! So please don't write in to me and say that people in N.I. talk about far more intelligent and interesting things that chocolate, stupidity, tea, and rain. but, I suppose it wouldn't be much better if you wrote in to say that you agreed with what I've written!

Swearing...

Frig(in'), Feck(in'), Flip(in')  All taken from the word fuck.
Bloody. Same as fuckin', but not quite as harsh.
Bollucks. Same as bullshit.
Shite. Shit.
Arse. Ass.
Fuck up. Shut up.
Kick his fuck in. Kick the shit out of him.
Fucked off. Pissed off.
Seven shades of shite. Lots of shit.
Nob. Penis.
He/She doesn't know his arse from his elbow. Doesn't know what he's doing.
Arse about tit. Wrong way round.
Come on to fuck. Hurry up.

The 101 ways to say you're drunk... (well..not literally)

 

Pissed as a fart Rubbered  Bolloxed  Hammered  Monkeyed  Blitzed  Pissed

Pole-axed  Stocious  Steamin'  Blocked  Spastic  Full

Half-cut/Cut  Blootered  Plastered  Rat-arsed  Parallel  Fucked  Mangled